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| This is the closing of my journal. It has come to my attention that almost all my friends that I have made since the begining of highschool think I'm a loser layabout failure with no future and a lack of vision. As of right now, there's no reason to continue a journal for people who just laugh at me when I'm turned.
Aparently I'm just an all around bad person. I don't know why no one has told me the truth untill now, I'm sorry for everyone that I aparently hurt. I realize I'm only getting in the way of other people's futures with my aparent lack there of.
I'm going to find a way to get out of town somehow. I just need to get away from here. I'm obviously just a joke.
This is the end of my journal and most of my friendships.
~Johnny
P.S. Thank you, Lauren for telling me how everyone feels about me. Honosty, although cutting deep, should always be in the light. | | |
| Have you ever gotten a CD of a band you never heard of prior to the by; then you listen to them and you end up asking yourself "How the hell did I live my life without this music?" That's how I am with Arcade Fire lately. Ever since I purchised their CD, life's seriously gotten better. Things just seem more up beat and happy.
I guess it's just a phase I'm going through, but I like it, so I'm staying here. There's no reason for me to move on. For once I'm not filled with angst and anger. It's all been replaced with artistic vision and overwhelming dancing feelings. I think some people call it "happy", but I don't think it's exactly happyness. I still feel the taint of depression pumping through my heart. But, you know, this is the closest I've been to happyness.
I realize I should probably start posting every day. I'm going to get to that when I lose the lazyness, or lack of interest in my days. It's probably the second.
Well, there's nothing more to say today. A Thespian post is working it's way around me, so I might be doing that sometime later tonight or something.
Johnny
"People that your dreams / are the only things that save ya. / Come on baby in our dreams / we can live our misbehavior." | | |
| I usually leave the "How Much I Hate Dumb People" or the "People Are Stupid" posts to Jim, but this time...oooooh this time, I can't take it.
PEOPLE ARE GETTING FUCKING DUMBER BY THE MINUTE.
I'm driving myself insane with trying not to just hit people. I wish, just for one minute, that people would just turn their fucking TVs off and read a book. NOT EROTICA OR COMICS...a real book. Something with a decent plot. Maybe *gasp* a positive message, or a poke at society. Then, I think, the world would be a better place. You know, Americans are dumb, but so is the rest of the world lately. THERE'S NO WAY TO ESCAPE THE STUPID. It's a plague, an unholy cancer eating away at society.
Turn off your fucking TV's and grab a good book. Go to the park, yes, that's outside. Dance in the rain. Run around giving people random hugs. BRIGHTEN SOMEONE'S DAY WITH A COMPLIMENT. Break out the thesaurus and start learning new words. VOCABULARY SKILLS.
Oh and another wonderful idea, stop writing like you're a four year old online. "wat ru doin 2nite!!!???!!!" IS NOT CORRECT EVER. If you've ever talked like that outside of a joking manner, go kill yourself. Right now, I'm waiting. MASS SUICIDE. Seriously, how did you pass first grade English? "inglish dont matter hear!!! its online not irl!!! newb!!!" FUCK OFF AND DIE IN A FIRE. English always matters, it's the language we speek, go figure. Pull the power cord out of your computer and hang yourself with it.
IN CONCLUTION: Stop being ignorant. Reality shows for the most part suck. Turn off the TV, get off the computer...unless you're doing something creative....and have fun outside or at a library. They do rent out books with DVD's, you know.
~Johnny
Fucking stupid people making me rant Foamy style. | | |
| Sometimes I realize how much it sucks having a creative mind and not creative hands. That's to say I can't draw as well as my mind says I should be able to. I have a story to tell. A very seriouse story that would look so wonderful in comic form, but I just can't get my hands to sketch out the visions.
I always get frustrated and give up. I should really stop doing that. I need a new sketch book and maybe I should take a class....with what imaginary money?
I'm really down right now because I can't tell my story.
~Johnny | | |
| Yeah, I'm here again, updating for the sake of updating. I have to get back into the swing of updating daily, that way, my posts are less lengthy.
I've been listening to a lot of Arcade Fire for the past two days and I love them. That and R.E.M....but, alas, as I make way for new obsessions, old music falls away. I look at the CDs that are now out of my CD case with a mix of great and horrible memories. I close a door in my life, and open a window...to jump out of.
~Johnny
"Everyone's a voyarist watching me watch them watching me right now" Modest Mouse: Paper Thin Walls | | |
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